The one where I curse Michele for reminding me of freshman English class

A few months ago, I was whining about my dissatisfaction with my life, and my own lack of motivation. A friend challenged me to actually do something about it. I accepted the challenge and promptly sat back on the couch and forgot about it. She finally got sick of my excuses and told me to "[write] a story about what your perfect life would be if you didn't have any financial or physical limitations."

During my freshman year of college, in my English 101 class, I was given an assignment to write about my own personal hero. It was a purely subjective topic; who can say what makes someone a "hero" to another person? I wrote that I did not have a "hero," but that I admired my mother for the way she conducted her life. I got a C- on the paper. Not because of the writing style, or any technical deficiencies, but simply because the grad student who taught the class didn't like that I didn't follow the rest of the class in writing about Ghandi or Mother Theresa, or any of the other typical heroes.

He offered me the chance to rewrite the paper. I next wrote that while it was good to have people to look up to, it seemed that the public chose heroes based on a particular skill set (athletic prowess, charm, physical appearance, public works) and not on how a person handled themselves on a day-to-day basis. I criticized the assignment as short-sighted and superficial. I got an F on the rewrite, but I stood by my sentiment.

I look at my mother and I see someone who may not be satisfied with how her life turned out, but who is determined to wake up and meet her obligations every day. She didn't get a chance to go to college (I couldn't say if she ever really wanted to), began working at an early age, and then became a single mother. She married my father when I was young, had another daughter, and re-entered the workforce.

What hopes and dreams did she have for herself before her life changed? Did she even think that she had options beyond being a wife and mother and working at a pink-collar job until she retired? About 15-20 years ago, I asked her if she had to do it [being a single mom] all over again, would she? She thought a minute and said, "no." It hurt me deeply at the time - to think that her life wasn't satisfying enough and that she had such regrets that she never voiced. I understand her answer a lot better now.

It's not every day that you get the chance to truly help out someone else, in a spectacular fashion. There are unsung heroes in all of our lives. Not just the people who volunteer, or make massive contributions to worthy causes, but those who plod along their daily lives with minimal complaints.

So, although I can't turn back time - and really, considering the consequences to myself, I wouldn't - if I had unlimited financial resources, I would give my mother whatever she wanted. I expect that she would make different choices with this opportunity than she would have if she'd been presented with it 38 years ago. I expect that she would travel some, with or without the rest of us. She'd probably then buy a property somewhere where she would relax. She probably wouldn't settle too close to her family, if for no other reason than for a change of pace.

I suppose this isn't technically writing about what my perfect life would be, but then again I never was good at following directions. Besides, it would be worth it to see my mother get the chance to spread her wings, even this late in the game. And that would be perfect.