Charlie Brown never learns.

There's a legal concept that basically says that that if you have some good indication that the other person in an agreement is going to back out of a deal, you have the right to back out first.

(BTW - I have to tell you that the partner at my firm actually quoted Wikipedia in a motion for summary judgment last week. I kid you not.)

This comes up a lot more than you'd think. For example, this morning when I texted a friend about brunch today, I found out that she'd already eaten because I got back to her so late. No worries. Being absolute food whores, we agreed to just go out for lunch, instead. No harm. No Foul.

But what do you do when the agreement is for something a hell of a lot more important to you? It is devastating when someone places these hoops for you to jump through - fully thinking that you won't be able/willing to clear them all, or that you'll forget by the time the payment comes due...

It's like when your parents get tired of you begging for a puppy, and they finally tell you, "Ok, but first you have to get your grades up." So you get your grades up, and then there's suddenly another obstacle. "Well, I have to see that you're responsible, so let's start with a fish." The fish makes it a couple months, but now the parents remind you that a dog is a lot more responsibility...so you get a job walking dogs. Or volunteering at the pound. Or dog-sitting for the neighbors...

Every time you meet their goals, they move the posts on you. Now, it's been 8 months. You've done everything they've asked. It's time to put up or shut up. But, no one's said anything about the ultimate prize. No one has congratulated you on overcoming each obstacle. There has been no mention of a puppy.

And you're afraid to ask. Because you *know* what the answer is going to be. Not only that the promise will be broken, but that you've gone through all this trouble for nothing. Or worse than nothing, because each time you meet the goal and don't get what you expected, your heart dies just a little bit more. And you don't think you can handle one more effing rejection.

I know that I will never get my "puppy." I know that, even though I am *this* close to making it through that last effing hoop (new and improved! with flames!), there is no way there will be a "puppy" at the end of it. But still...I keep trying.

What's the "definition of insanity?" Yup. Me.

But I don't want to let the promissor get off easy, you know? I don't want to be the girl that guys think they just stop calling and she'll just go away. I want to make a scene. I want them to actually 'fess up and finally admit that they lied, that there never was a "puppy."

This time, I want to take a run at that football, and when it is inevitably pulled away at the last minute, I am going to drag Lucy down into the dirt with me and beat the living shit out of her.

Hee.